Goodbye.

Things I've Learned From Higher Education

1. Bureaucracy is God. Even if you have the cure to bloody cancer in your research papers, they will most definitely not care unless you also have a document signed by individuals that are never at their offices and don't own mobile phones and don't reply to e-mails. Best part? You get the blame.

2. Pretend. Pretend it's someone else's fault so your parents don't yell at you for something that will in no way add to your life experience or happiness yet is still apparently important because numbers on a piece of paper clearly show how smart you are. Pretend you know what you don't care about just to get over it faster. Pretend you care just to not get nagged. Pretend.

3. Nobody really cares. And the few that do have little power of changing things.

4. Big words are usually empty. The amount of ginormous words used is directly proportional to the % of bullshit. And just because you use them does not make you king and queen of cheese, my friend.

5. Learn by heart and do not question. What? You have opinions? How cute, now move along and listen to what we have to say about what you have to think.

6. Intelligent people can get around by doing very little. It's a thing. You do only the necessary and leave more room for what you actually like, this usually resulting in mediocre grades and higher overall happiness levels. This does not make you a failure. It makes the educational system a failure.

7. Naps are vital. For finding yourself and deciding whether the 6 page long report on sea slugs is actually that important.

8. Why. You will ask this question a lot. Why sit in class while an almost defunct teacher reads outdated theories out loud for you to write down and memorize word for word. Why attend any class that has one-way communication. Why accept opinions instead of challenging them. Why allow your mind to become so dull that conversations about the weather will seem like a good idea. Why.



I'm just very upset today, and not even coffee and denial will change it.

Lies I Heard This Week

Lie #1: Wisdom teeth aren't that well grounded and probably don't even have strong roots anyway.
Bullshit. Mine were burrowed deep into the recesses of my fucking skull, reaching for the fucking mines of fucking Moria for all I know, and the roots became coiled whips of pain and torture once touched by human hand and/or tool. You little shits.

Lie #2: If it didn't hurt me, it probably won't hurt you.
Fact: It did fucking hurt me, you inconsiderate egocentric bastards! It hurt me so much I felt the screeches of my healthy tooth being torn to pieces by metallic drills long after it was brutally pulled out of my traumatized gums.

Lie #3: You'll be able to eat after three hours.
Are you fucking kidding me? It's been three days and I still eat mashed bananas and soup. Why? Because it still fucking hurts, that's why.

Fuck.

Vienna waits for you

Slow down, you crazy child, You're so ambitious for a juvenile...

Double Exposure

Back in Vienna for a few days, to tie up loose ends and put everything in order. It's still pretty cold over here, and what should have been the first day of spring turned out to be gloomy and freezing (even with two sweaters and a trench coat. Still cold. Wth. It's March. Get with the times, Austria!)

It always feels weird, returning somewhere. I guess it's just how Charlotte from Lost in Translation put it: "Let's never come here again, because it would never be as much fun." And it's kind of how I feel right now. It's all very familiar yet foreign, like I both belong and not belong. 

It's an odd sentiment of being in the in-betweens, trying to figure out where you stand in a place where you 
once lived. After checking out from the dorm, all signs of my presence will be erased. They diligently clean 
your room, scrub out the tape residue, slap on a coat of fresh paint and voila - you're a stranger. 

Rant over.

At least I'm going to spend a couple of days in Budapest. Looking forward to the hostel, which promises to be awesome.

Year 2 was cool. Yeah.

Ah yes, finals last year were hell.

I remember year two of college like it was a year ago. And since I am now living in a new dorm - which may be better in what living conditions are concerned, but is in no way better - I felt like doing a flashback post. I miss my old room, amazing roommate, the campus and the overall atmosphere of the ol' place way more than I'd have expected. It might have been dirty at times, with insects roaming around and broken showers and toilets that wouldn't close or flush and kitchens that looked like dumpsters and people sleeping on the floors of said kitchens and noisy, but it was awesome. And I miss it. And even though this new place feels like I'm living in a weird Ikea ripoff, I don't care. I have a balcony, a huge room, a hallway and bathrooms, but who cares. I miss the artistic vibe of the old place. This just feels like I'm in a white box-like tower, far far away. And the trams don't work during the night.

Un.

Fucking.

Cool.